Strange New Creature
Sunday, Feb. 19, 2006, 08:35
I had a nice conversation with a new friend over IM and he said somethings that eeriely hit the nail on the head. It was almost as if I had known him before in a previous life....well, it was like I had dated him before anyway. His name as well, seemed oddly familiar and I thought "I feel like I should know him from somewhere." I guess it will all become clear once we meet in person. He is indeed very different from the other men I have met.
Anyway, I digress. The point is that he said some things about my dating style and failed relationships that made a whole lot of sense. I explained to him how things seem to "fizzle out" quickly and men lose interest in me and how I think that I may be too available to the men I date. I also told him how my exs all return to try to rekindle something and its really frustrating because I am over it by that point.
The convo was as follows:
Strange New Creature: you're committing too early to the relationship and they feel that they have caught you too easily.
:only after its over they realize what a good catch you were compared to others, but they have already blown it.
: you seem to them to be committed and they havent really earned it. so they stray, then realize they had a good one after comparing you to the next one.
Prissy: but you know, I don't like to play games....so if I like you and enjoy your company I don't see any point in making you jump through hoops for my attention.
Strange New Creature: I understand that. but heres the deal...familiarity breeds contempt.
: it does.
: its a damn shame, but it does.
: you have to mix it up with men. keep them off balance.
: make them feel like kings when you're with them. then every once in awhile, just act like you dont care.
: I know, it sounds like a game. but if you dont, they are going to come to lose interest.
Prissy: I'll probably be single forever.
Strange New Creature: no you wont.
So what is your take on this? Should I play the cat and mouse game (which I detest) just to get and keep a man interested??? Should I change my dating style and become more aloof and unavailable? Should I pull out the hoops and set up the obstacle course?
Sheesh, this seems like too much behavior modification for one day.
I'll probably be single forever........
*Is this why J feels as if he loves me....because I have been technically unavailable to him for nearly two years........hmmmmmm.
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