Hindsight
Thursday, Aug. 14, 2003, 13:14
My last entry was a bit unfair and crass...it's amazing what hurt feelings can make you say or do. Rejection hurts, but it also opens your eyes. When someone tells you that there are too many differences between you and that a long term relationship is futile, it hurts, but to hear those words also makes you do a lot of soul searching. I was hurt because I heard you say that I was not good enough for you and deep in the pit of my stomach, I had been expecting it to happen. I was naive to ever think that I could compare to the calibur of women that you usually date. However, those were not the words that you SAID, but it is what I HEARD.
We have talked again since the fateful night that you told me that you did not see us in a long term or married relationship(I realize that it is way too soon to even fathom such things but I did push by asking you where I stood and what the odds were of this thing going anywhere.) and now I am confused.....you now say things that hint that there may still be a chance for us, once we know each other better. Only time will tell, and from all of this I have learned that ignorance is bliss. I was trying to avoid misunderstandings and hurt feelings, but I got hurt anyway. It was entirely my fault because I asked a stupid question and you were honest in your answer. I appreciate your honesty and look forward to whatever may come of this.
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