Fear
Thursday, Sept. 18, 2003, 09:13
I feel the fear slowly slipping away. I am still very uncertain sometimes, but not as fearful as before. I think that I may be able to do this. I know that I want to more than anything. To let you into my heart and soul would be a blessing at this point in my life. To have a friend, confidante,supporter, lover all rolled into one. I want to be those things for you, and I could if it weren't for the fear. Fear of rejection, fear of devastation, fear of not being able to pull myself out of the depression that would follow if I were to be heartbroken again. I know that I shouldn't let past experiences determine my future actions. I know this. Easier said than done. Although I do feel the fear slowly slipping away, and that is because of you. You told me that there are so many things about me that are exactly what you are looking for. It helps to hear such things. I may fall in love in spite of myself.
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