Poker
Saturday, Oct. 25, 2003, 09:46
Isn't it truly unbelievable what a broken heart can to do to your sense of adventure? How something like devastation can take all of the fun out of the most joyous feeling in the world. It can make you afraid to feel, afraid to want, afraid to hope that all your desires and dreams could come true. It makes you question yourself, your very own thoughts and feelings. You doubt everything good that you feel and you over think every little detail of everything. You begin to question others, their intentions, their motives and you always wonder what in the hell they want or suspect that they are always up to something.
It is a miserable existence, but not so easily escaped. Fear can keep you paralyzed in a frozen pond of despair, afraid to move forward because you feel somehow that just when things are looking safe and steady...the ice will break again and you will fall beneath the murky surface for yet another hellish period of time,freezing and alone, waiting for the Spring thaw to warm you and melt your heart.
You can meet the most wonderful person in the world, your perfect match, two peas in a pod, but you still question every emotion that you feel. Terribly afraid of making a mistake and loving or trusting the wrong person with your heart.
Some would say that life is a poker game, love is a gamble....but how do you play when all of your chips are shattered into a million pieces???
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