Continuity
Tuesday, Dec. 02, 2003, 11:32
I must be a fool, a blooming idiot. What single girl in her right mind dumps a potential partner right before the holidays? What stooge would send a "Dear John" letter a few weeks before her birthday, and a month before Christmas? I love everything about December except the fact that I usually don't have a significant other to kiss under the mistletoe, no one to give a special gift to, no one to kiss on New Year's Eve.............so why in heavens name did I send that stupid email telling D that I wanted to be more than a friend with benefits and that I couldn't see him anymore if he wasn't offering to be more than that????
Sometimes I wish that I could be a game player, a user and a gold digger. I wish that I were the type to use a rebound lover for everything he was worth....hold on to him long enough to milk a few great gifts from on Christmas.....you know, hang in there until after Jan 1st and then dump him once the good stuff was safely in my possession.
But, I have never been like that, if my heart wasn't truly in the situation, then I got out. No ands, ifs or buts about it. I would rather be alone for the holidays than to use someone else for any reason. And it looks like this year will be no exception.....I will stay home on my birthday, watch others kiss under the mistletoe, and drink hot cocoa, alone watching the ball drop in Times Square on the tube. Oh well, there is something to be said for continuity.
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